what shall i do now?

"grasp the time" always in my mind but i didn't practise it in my daily life...

i have a to-do-list in my notebook but i ignored it. even until this moment, i'm facing the laptop didn't do any necessary things. just bear in mind, 6pm fetch mom back from work.

• official document (tomorrow go putrajaya)
• assignment (go library, when?) (do it at home, started?)
• shopping with family
• watch orphan (shall i complete the important things or leisure come first?)

bible verse:
matthew 7:13-14
"enter in through the narrow gate, for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and many are those who enter through it.
because narrow is the gate and constricted is the way that leads to life, and few are those who find it."

there is a trend in today's age. many follows and the gate is widely open. undeniable, i'm following it too... i feel so meaningless and not even know 'what shall i do now'...
time is passing moment by moment, still love the 'life's brief candle' by william shakespeare. last word 'signifying nothing'...

only God can fill my empty spirit and guide me to the correct path. but few find the way... i have to be awaked! be vigilant! be decisive and give Him the pre-eminence as He is living in my spirit!

at home

1 week holiday is started. today is the 4th day of my holidays, and 4 more days i will be going back kb.

i'm at home now, but my brother is not here. i couldn't see he is sitting on his rocking chair, i couldn't hear his voice,his laughter and his shadow. gor gor, i want to hold your hand and walk with you...

i had a private message in skype and posted on facebook :
"gor gor, im missing you. missing your smile, missing the moment we were holding hands and walked together. i still couldn't accept the depature of your soul :.( "

feelings can be expressed in words and tears is the overflowing of sadness.

i have lost my only brother

it has been 48days i didn't go back home. another 12days i will be having 1 week break. but.. but...

on 8/8/2009, 8.45pm... i receive a death news from home.

dad : gor gor just passed away half an hour ago...

my tears started to trickle down my cheek. why is this happening? it was too sudden, i couldn't accept it. until i saw him in the coffin... it is a truth...